Controlling Your Anger

When you don’t control your anger, this can cause you to have bad health and bad relationships. There are things you can do to help control your anger. Anger is called many things such as rage or hatefulness but no matter what you call it, it is something that won’t help you.

Anger is an experience that is natural to people and when you get mad because your feelings get hurt or when you get frustrated at something that went wrong, it often causes anger.  The problem is that when you can’t keep your anger in control, it can hurt your life.

What is Anger

Anger is not just one thing, but it can come in different forms and degrees. Some people are angry all the time and they can’t get over their anger. Some get angry here and there and it can come out explosive.

No matter how your anger comes, if you cannot control it, it can affect your health and your overall wellbeing. Anger can make you develop heart disease and can lead to worse diseases than that. Anger can lead to stress and anxiety and cause you to have digestion problems, headaches and more.

On top of that, anger can cause you to do risky behaviors or to be violent. This can lead to addiction which will really hurt your relationships with friends and family.

How to Stop Anger

Anger can happen when things happen in and out of your life. Maybe you are mad at someone or mad about work and this can lead to anger. You might also get mad in traffic or at something you saw on the news. No matter where these feelings come from, you cannot let your anger control you. Here are ways to keep calm:

Make Smart Choices

You have to learn to check yourself when you start to get angry. Look at this as a negative emotion and identify that you are getting upset. This can help you to learn to start to relax before your anger gets out of control.

Don’t Think on It

When something happens that upsets you, stop thinking about it. Don’t keep bringing it up again and again. If you have an issue with anger, this is a very important thing to remember. Focus on things that you are thankful for when angry situations come.

Change Your Thoughts

If you get angry, it becomes easy to let things feel worse. Try to restructure your thinking and take the negative thoughts and replace them with positive thoughts. Instead of thinking that everything is wrong, try to see that it’s not that bad.

Here are some ways to change your thoughts:

  • Don’t say words like, “never” or “always” when you are talking about yourself or talking about other people. These make you not want to work things out for the good.
  • Be logical. When you are angry, you might become irrational and hard to talk to. Learn to look at things from a different perspective.
  • Look at your desires. People that get angry will not think things are fair or feel apricated. Change the way that you are seeing things and if things don’t work out how you want them to, don’t let it turn to anger.

Try to Relax

By just relaxing you can stop some of your anger. Practice these things to learn to relax when anger comes:

  • Deep breathing. Try deep breathing when you get angry. By being in control of your breathing, you can calm down.
  • Imagine something good. Let your memory take over and imagine something good.
  • Relax your muscles. Try progressive muscle relaxation. This means you tense all of your muscles one at a time and then relax them.


Instead of jumping to conclusions and getting angry, try talking to someone. Don’t say the first thing that comes to your mind but stop and listen. This can help you to not react in an angry way. Always try to cool down before you talk to someone that has upset you.

Be Active

Go out and exercise on a regular basis. If you are someone that is angry a lot, workout more. Try boxing or running.

Avoid Triggers

Figure out what makes you mad and try to avoid these things. Adjust your time to try and not get in stressful situations such as rush hour in traffic. Don’t talk about topics that make you angry.

You won’t be able to get rid of all of your anger, but you can learn to be more in control of how you react to things that make you made.

Talk to a Psychologist

If you are always getting angry or feelings stressed, try talking to a licensed psychologist. They can help you to be in control of your thoughts and your feelings and to keep your anger in check.